с чем едять американцев?
Last post 07-12-2007, 6:22 by Sappho. 302 replies.
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07-13-2007, 6:45 PM |
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07-13-2007, 7:02 PM |
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07-13-2007, 7:09 PM |
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mkgilstrap
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Joined on 11-25-2006
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(Georgia) USA
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Posts 697
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I would break down the term "high maintenance" into two categories.
First Category... High maintenance financially.
This category is self expanitory. She has to have the best of everything. Expensive clothes, perfumes, vacations, cars, biggest house, biggest diamond ring, earrings, anything she wants, she has to have. And the MAN is expected to provide this. She may supplement some of this lifestyle with her own income, but she is looking to you also. Others here will be able to add I am sure.
Second Category. High maintenance emotionally
This category is much more difficult to explain. I would venture that a HME woman needs constant attention. Maybe can't be too independent. Life generally for her runs from crisis to crisis. The man is generally reduced to life walking on eggshells, never knowing what he might say or do to set this type off in some direction or another. Life and sex is dependant on what mood she is in. May even take Prozac. ( may need it and not take it also... : ) )
Just a few thoughts.
Always judge others by the same standards as you would want them to judge you
Make each day count to improve yourself and those around you
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07-13-2007, 7:11 PM |
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07-13-2007, 7:15 PM |
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James Bond
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Joined on 02-15-2007
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Atlanta (Georgia) USA
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Posts 1,341
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I am very qualified to talk on this subject - having married/dated several high maintenance ladies, and having dated 1 low maintenance girl.
Examples of high maintenance:
1. cries easily - generally requires concessions to bring her back out of crying spell. Crying to occur on a weekly or bi-weekly basis.
2. Ready to argue incessantly to get her way. If you don't agree and walk away - argument to be continued later. If in bed, and argument is not resolved...tap on shoulder to irritate.
3. There are boundries that can't be crossed. If she's not the crying type, then it may be that you get the cold cold shoulder with little eye contact until those boundries are respected.
4. money is usually an issue with high-maintenance women....the more money you spend the less grief they give you. Not spending to their satisfaction results in 1. and 2. and 3 (above).
5. they must feel in control of the relationship. It's pretty much acknowledged that they are the 'boss'.
6. little respect for your time or schedule....late for things that are important for you, you are scheduling around their free time. After all, they come first.
7. There is plenty wrong with you to start. either they want to change things about you, or recognize that you are a hopeless case.
Low maintenance.
1. Doesn't cry much...maybe once every 2 or 3 months.
2. Doesn't argue much, if ever.
3. Open minded. willing to cross boundries, even if they prefer to go back to their safe zone.
4. Money is not a priority. Personal relationships take priority.
5. More of a team player. If you are lucky enough to find a low maintenance woman she is looking up to you as the stronger of the two.
6. respects your time
7. Accepts you for who you are.
I should mention something about self esteem. Obviously, the high-maintenance women have the Cinderlla complex...that's how they got to be high-maintenance. The Low Maintenance may suffer from the opposite...a feeling they are inferior due to 'some' reason. Not that high maintenance don't have their issues too.
Geezus...how does ANYBODY ever make relationships work. lol
"Hopeless in Atlanta"
"Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable."
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07-13-2007, 7:32 PM |
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07-13-2007, 7:38 PM |
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07-13-2007, 7:48 PM |
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07-13-2007, 8:01 PM |
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07-13-2007, 8:11 PM |
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07-13-2007, 8:36 PM |
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07-13-2007, 8:44 PM |
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07-13-2007, 8:47 PM |
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07-13-2007, 8:50 PM |
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Mouse
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Joined on 05-23-2006
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Atlanta
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Posts 656
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If someone is interested here http://www.sharedpaths.com/tools/lovelanguages.html is a paraphrase of some book (I don't recommend the book, paraphrase is more than enough..)
So the idea is that there are 5 'languages we speak/want to be spoken to':
quote
1. hearing words that affirm
2. quality time spent together
3. receiving gifts and tokens of caring
4. having things done for you
5. physical touch and connection
All of us need all five languages/forms of love, but there is one (or two), that is our "primary language" and crucial to our feeing love and cared for. If our partner does not speak to us in our "primary language" we feel as if something is missing, and we feel unloved, even if they are speaking to us in their own "primary language"
/quote
So, the same person can be a 'high-m' for one, a 'low-m' for someone else.
Well, I like the way it is being explained. Moreover it can improve understanding people around you.
PS Still I don't recommend reading the whole book, as it was written by a preacher (?), I mean, it gives a specific flavor.
This is like deja vu all over again. Yogi Berra
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07-13-2007, 8:53 PM |
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