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Originally posted by Egor: Minime, you would make a great saleswoman!

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that I can be

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I agree that everyone probably has heard this already.. Even James Bond For me personally it is easy to see that you are right. Even though I've never experienced it, I know you are right. Just always said "why now?" ________________________________________ "Я это понимаю на рациональном уровне, но не могу принять на эмоциональном" --Бизнесмен Борис Березовский

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Man I think are little bit different. Most of the time a baby news is brought to you as a fact :))

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Originally posted by Egor:

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Originally posted by Leah:

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Originally posted by Egor: Leah, so then why the irritation?

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The reason for my irritation should be obvious. You suggested that my "marketable traits" might be in decline.

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Originally posted by Egor: Why the hesitation to enter the topic?

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Far more complicated... It is a highly charged topic and I am prone to changing my mind about lots of other things, so.... What if I wake up at 40 in a panic and have limited time? What if I wake up at 50 or 60 and regret what I didn't do? What if I wake up tomorrow and want them, go through all that must be done to try, and then can't? Additionally, I don't think you realize, as a man, how much this topic comes up for women. Complete strangers feel they have the right to comment about my reproductive status and often do. That is a violation.

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You used the word "my" a lot of times here.. I just want you to go back and see that these things were not said or implied about "you" any more than me, or than anyone else here, or on this planet :) And these aren't unknown things.. sexual attraction fades w age.. Why can't a discussion like that be had on the basis of pure reason? We all are facing it, it doesn't have to be treated like a cancer. So the best bet, i think everyone here agrees is to just do what makes you happy. If it's a hard decision, maybe more than one thing can make you happy :) ________________________________________ "Я это понимаю на рациональном уровне, но не могу принять на эмоциональном" --Бизнесмен Борис Березовский

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Dare I bring this topic back to the top or should I just let it fade away? I do want to answer you though. I never thought it was directed only at me, but unless you are unaware that I am female, I must assume that I am included in your opinion about the marketable traits of women... no matter how much I would like to delude myself into thinking I am an exception to the laws of nature. :) As for why it can't be discussed, as it applies to any gender, without treating it like a cancer, I guess it is just scary. But, ok, I'm game for discussing it dispassionately. I've never claimed to be a great beauty and I don't choose partners based on looks, but since men are different, is a reasonable amount of intelligence, personality and humor enough to compensate for the loss of sexual attractiveness that will come with age? Also, what age is that?

If you have the courage to ask the question, then I have the courage to answer it.... Does personality, intelligence, & humor offset the loss of good looks? That depends on a lot of things - mostly the guy you are with. And I guess that is the point - your best bet is to meet the man you are destined to be with by a certain age. Because if by 'some' age, you have not met the 'right' person, then at some point you do lose your window of opportunity. Not to catch a man - but to catch the man you might have wanted. A better man. At some point, that 'better' man will probably go find the younger woman that also has personality, intelligence and humor. I'm not being sexist. There are some older women that end up with younger men. Especially those women with money. But plenty of older men drift to younger women because we are shallow about looks. That's just the way we are. The best situation for everybody is when 2 people meet when they are both in their prime, and stick it out for the long run. When people get divorced in their 30s/40's/50's things get a lot tougher because all the good ones are taken (so to speak)....and for women the harder part is dealing with the loss of their good looks which is what we men tend to place the most value on during the initial dating phase. You can always catch 'somebody'. But it gets harder and harder to find the right somebody the older you get. On the other hand, a lot of women don't put as much emphasis on looks, so maybe it's ok to settle for an ugly single guy. Since my personal feeling is that "beauty is skin deep, but ugly goes all way way to the bone", I'm happy to be a man.

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"Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable."

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Originally posted by pomidorchik: i've been so nice in the last 48 hours

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Wow, you really have. Can I have you when I turn 40?

how did we get from parental instincts to this?

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James, that it the kind of post you write with either a blindfold over your face and cigarette in your mouth, or you avoid your computer for a few days after you hit the "post new reply" button. LOL But you nailed it. Always judge others by the same standards as you would want them to judge you

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Make each day count to improve yourself and those around you

that is the beauty of being 'anonymous'. You can say what you really think. It's very liberating. Being 42, I find women between the ages of 32 and 37 to be 'perfect'. They are mentally/emotionally mature, but still sexy. 30 is too young emotionally, 40 is too old physically. It's tough getting this old. It's all downhill from here...

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"Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable."