the poor don't pay much in Legal fees cuz there ain't nothin' to get.

the rich can pay pay hundreds of thousands in divorce costs, but hell, they still have millions left so who cares....it's just the principle of the matter (and interest).

mk is still the winner on this site.  And I'm happy to handfast a hot russian girl of 23 (or older) to do my part in bi-lateral Russian-American relationships.

As much as you can't generalize, we all love to do it.  Most of y'all here are here because you want to be.  We can all USA-bash, but we are here cuz we haven't found anyplace better to go (I keep trying).

 

 

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"Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable."

James Bond:

 Most of y'all here are here because you want to be.  We can all USA-bash, but we are here cuz we haven't found anyplace better to go (I keep trying).

Well, the problem is it takes a lot of effort and lost years in the prime of people's lives to move around and evaluate countries.  Me personally, I am pretty sure this is the best place for me, but I've stopped making this argument for other people.  They just are not inconvenienced enough to uproot their families.  As the years go on, it is harder and harder to make the case that this is panacea.  You start listing qualities - life, opportunity, liberty, prosperity, personal freedom, culture, education, health care, whatever is on your list - Its getting harder to make the case that the US is even in the top 5 in any of these.  You can also look at immigration patterns worldwide, it is now false to say "everyone dreams of coming here".  The numbers don't show that anymore.

This is why I am so hell bent on radical solutions to the problems we are having, and so critical of everything in the politics section.  Free ride is over, only intellect and pragmatism can bring it back.  And I have a personal stake, this is my country now, most likely for the rest of my life.  I am disgusted by everyone taking it for granted and wasting it away. Too much empty talking about how great we are. 

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"Я это понимаю на рациональном уровне, но не могу принять на эмоциональном" --Бизнесмен Борис Березовский

So many judges, psychologists, analytics and psychiatrists this site has to offer - amazing! You know, women who demand all, most or half of their husbands' money during the divorce, remind me of minorities who receive special "treatment" in this society. Do you want to enter the University? Do so with your own brain, not with the color of your skin! Why would a woman, who has any respect for herself, as an individual, ask for a special treatment? Why should she receive more out of marriage than her husband? Because she is a woman, a mother of his children? Give me a break. If he is a provider for his family, shouldn't a woman contribute as well by cooking, cleaning, doing things around the house? Isn't this common sense or "labor distribution"? I am yet to find a man who would refuse to help me clean the house or go grocery shopping or cook a meal for me. Don't his contributions count?! And why do you even need to count who does more/less stuff? Shouldn't you simply do the best you can to make sure that your marriage/relationship works instead of expecting "stuff" from your spouce/partner?! Regarding cheating, I am yet to try and understand why people love to complicate their lives by lying, stabbing others in the back, hurting others. Isn't it simpler to separate from your spouce/partner, if things aren't working out, and then do what you must? People are selfish brats for the most part, who do not want to face responsibilities for their own actions. It's easier to screw another in the ass, hire a lawyer, and get as much of his/her assets as you can... God, I wanna move to another planet.

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"Some say the Muses are nine: how careless! Look, there's Sappho too, from Lesbos, the tenth." Plato

Bravo!

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see, everything you said, Sappho, I put in a simple formula.  That's the difference between men and women

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"Я это понимаю на рациональном уровне, но не могу принять на эмоциональном" --Бизнесмен Борис Березовский

The ability to control their own fertility is the key for women to erase that difference.

Bravo, Sappho,  Well said.  Standing on your own two feet and accepting individual responsibility is, IHMO, a very high attribute for someone to possess. 

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Make each day count to improve yourself and those around you

Egor:

see, everything you said, Sappho, I put in a simple formula.  That's the difference between men and women

While some women may be more practical than some men, I tend to think that it's an individual difference, not a gender difference.
 

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"Some say the Muses are nine: how careless! Look, there's Sappho too, from Lesbos, the tenth." Plato

Muidugi:

The ability to control their own fertility is the key for women to erase that difference.

The ability to attain balance is the key to happiness, according to Aristotle. The old man might've been right :)

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"Some say the Muses are nine: how careless! Look, there's Sappho too, from Lesbos, the tenth." Plato

IIRC, the old man talked about attaining a purpose in life as a key to happiness. Attaining balance is  Buddha's recipe for it.

According to the American Constitution "Every man has the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness". Doesn't say anything about woman.

The forum cracks me up...  formulas and arguments for who gets what after a divorce...  if only people (as a whole) spent this much time on figuring out how to salvage the decomposing remains of a traditional family structure :)

On one hand, I'm glad to see that we, women, expect more out of relationships and are not tolerant of men who can't satisfy our needs (those who don't like generalizations, sorry).  Don't know the actual stats on this, but I'm sure we are one of the biggest reasons for the skyrocketing divorce rates.  On the other hand, the institution of marriage has become a joke.  Sadly, we are teaching younger generations not to even bother.  The family unit as we know it has been broken down to a smidge, so why bother with the pretense of marriage at all? :) The few who don't think twice about the possibility of a divorce when they tie the knot are considered fools. I'm scared to think of how much worse things will get when our children and grandchildren become young adults.

 

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Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when her mother is feeling chilly. ~Ambrose Bierce

Muidugi:

IIRC, the old man talked about attaining a purpose in life as a key to happiness.

I was specifically referring to Aristotle's work "Nicomachean Ethics," where he discusses every aspect of human life to show that balance is a key to happiness. For instance, he talks how overindulging in sex, food, work, etc. affects human life and what the lack of aformentioned activities does to human life. Basically, it destroys life; thus, according to the old man, finding and maintaining a balance in life is a path to happiness.

What exactly were you referring to, if I may?

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"Some say the Muses are nine: how careless! Look, there's Sappho too, from Lesbos, the tenth." Plato

Bagel Roll:

The family unit as we know it has been broken down to a smidge, so why bother with the pretense of marriage at all? :) The few who don't think twice about the possibility of a divorce when they tie the knot are considered fools. I'm scared to think of how much worse things will get when our children and grandchildren become young adults.

In my opinion, being open minded and viewing divorce as a viable option is a good thing to have happened in this society. How many unhappy couples stay together because they are "married?" What is marriage? Why do married people get tax breaks? Why is life not being celebrated, regardless whether the one who leads it has chosen to share it or live on his/her own? How many people have affairs behind their partner's backs and still stay together? I believe, if you are unhappy, if another person is miserable with you or you are miserable with him/her, get out, live your life, ENJOY the time you have on this planet as much as you can! Attain your own happiness, and then you'll be able to make those around you happy too. Why live according to someone else's rules and traditions? Who says that marriage is the best way to lead this life for everyone? I know so many couples in the US, and many more couples back in FSU countries who are not happily married but they don't know how else they can live their lives. Sad! Life should be enjoyed as much as possible. Unfortunately, some people choose to suffer ... maybe it's because they were spanked as children, thus, they derive pleasure out of being abused ... poor little masochists!  (The last sentence is a reference to the post about spanking kids.) 

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"Some say the Muses are nine: how careless! Look, there's Sappho too, from Lesbos, the tenth." Plato

Muidugi:

According to the American Constitution "Every man has the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness". Doesn't say anything about woman.

A vi poprobuyte prochitat' v russkom perevode: "Kazhdiy chelovek imeet pravo ... " Nadeyus', tak ponyatnee  

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"Some say the Muses are nine: how careless! Look, there's Sappho too, from Lesbos, the tenth." Plato

Sappho:

 Why do married people get tax breaks?

3 reasons come to mind right away, though I am not sure what the original reasoning actually was..

1)Its a good investment for the government - kids raised in stable family unit are more likely to become better educated, make more money, pay more taxes.

2)Stability of civilization (in this case welfare of a nation) is believed to be dependent on a stable family unit.  I am not sure that this hasn't fallen apart, or to what extent its still true, but that is the classical belief for the duration of human civilization.

3)Assistance - they are encouraged to reproduce, kids can't work til 18 for humanitarian reasons, and monetary system financially discourages reproduction.  This evens things out somewhat. 

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"Я это понимаю на рациональном уровне, но не могу принять на эмоциональном" --Бизнесмен Борис Березовский